A Story Jar by Carol Harrison

Each person has a unique story. The stories of our lives are filled with memory moments, happy times, tough stuff, and things we would rather forget or wish had never happened. Sometimes I think of instances in my life and the everyday occurrences that happened during that period of time and am sure no one would want to listen to those stories. Yet my children, grandchildren and even other people think it is unique, unusual and at times just plain crazy when they hear about some of our memories.

I have always loved stories, both to listen to and to tell.Over the last few years my family has encouraged me to write them down, preserve them for future generations and even share some with the public. I sit at my computer and my mind draws a blank. The stories that flow as I interact with other family members suddenly hide in the recesses of memory. I need a prompt to discover them and coax them on to paper or the screen.

  One Christmas, I received this story jar from my oldest daughter. The white tag is titled Recipe for My Life History. The recipe reads, "Combine a generous slice of your life history, add a dash of nostalgia, several cups of facts and feelings and deliciously interesting questions. Draw one slip of paper. Take a few minutes to enjoy the memories, then paste or write the question at the tops of a blank page in a notebook and fill in your answer."

The small brown tag reads, " This product was prepared to preserve your life story. Enjoy the scrumptious, home-made memories that celebrate something very important - YOU!"

The gift intrigues me and I eagerly opened the jar to find it stuffed with strips of paper. Each piece had a number and a question typed on it. She had thought of many questions she desired an answer to, in order to help her know more about me - not just as mom, but as a person.

Some examples of questions included in this story jar include:
1. Are there any family heirlooms in your possession? Tell about these and how ou came to acquire them.
16. Describe your wedding dress, bridesmaids dresses
31. Do you have a special school memory ( high school or college)?
35. Do you remember a special birthday party you've had, given or been to?
65. Tell about the changes you've seen in your lifetime: society in general, technology, fashion, fads, morality, politics, etc.
67. Tell about your family traditions: Christmas, birthday, graduations, Thanksgiving, weddings, etc.
94. What makes each of your brothers and sisters ( or i-laws) special? Be specific.
102 Write a description of your husband.

I have had several hard cover books filled with questions and spaces to write your personal answers. The end result is meant to provide a family history. I read the questions, thought of answers but never put pen to paper to record my thoughts and memories. I always thought they lacked something, but could not pinpoint what it might be. This story jar offered a greater variety of questions, covered more aspects of my life and that of my family, including places to relate my faith journey.  I appreciated the prompts.

But to be honest, the years have passed and I have not grabbed a pretty notebook  or begun to answer the questions in the fashion the tag suggested. I let the jar sit on the shelf, procrastinating while I waited for the elusive someday to arrive. I still told stories to the family. I even have begun to write a few of them which have captured the answers to a few of the questions. Photos and journal entries have occasionally been scrapbooked together to provide more of the family story. The task of preserving my memories is far from complete.

This unique little story jar offers one method of prompting the capture of memories to compile a family history. People's imaginations and creativity can provide many other ideas. 

What about you? Have you begun a written record of memories and family history? If so, how did you begin the process? What method(s) have you employed?

Maybe you still have parents and/or grandparents whose stories you love to hear. Consider encouraging them to share them, not only orally but to write them down or record them in some fashion.

This year I plan to continue documenting family history, compiling it in an accessible manner. I might even get around to reading each question in that story jar from my daughter and making sure I write some answers for her to read.

Have fun as you look at the memories which make up your story.

Storyteller, speaker and writer, Carol Harrison, loves to share from the heart in groups of all sizes as well as one on one. She is a wife, mother and grandmother who knows all too well about the twists and turns of life but also that even when life is tough there is hope.  She makes her home in Saskatoon, SK with her husband Brian. Carol has published one book, Amee's Story and a number of short stories in Chicken Soup for the Soul books and other anthologies

Honouring through Story—Carolyn R. Wilker

This past week has been an exciting one as I distributed copies of my first picture book, Harry’s Trees, to my family. The book started as a way for my parents' great grandchildren to remember their great grandpa who died in May this past year. Some of the children are preschoolers and in early school age years, as my own grandchildren are, and may not remember him later, but it is my hope that they will enjoy the story and some day appreciate the legacy he left for them.

The theme of trees has been paramount in Dad’s life. He learned about them as a boy. They were Christmas trees; they were firewood to heat their home. They were a home for birds, a place to pick fruit, and as a boy, something to climb. They're a way of holding the earth in place, of cleaning the air. He learned lessons of life through them too, through the season changes and a place where squirrels climb and birds build their nests.

As Dad grew older, he learned more about trees, such as how to trim them when they were broken so that they might continue to thrive, and when they needed to come down. Just as important he taught us to name them and respect them as well.

Dad learned about grafting branches from one tree and putting them on another, much as doctors take an organ and transplant it into another body when the donor has died, so that someone else might have a second chance at a healthy life.

Dad checking out the trees on a holiday in Jamaica

 Fellow writers offered much wonderful feedback on my story in various stages, such as arranging the story into seasons. I thank them all for their valuable suggestions.

As I celebrate this book, and the memories of Dad that it evokes, along with the vivid and colourful illustrations of my talented artist, Maja Wizor, I dedicate it to my father for all he gave us as we were growing up, especially the passion he shared of honouring God’s creation.

a sample of  illustrations within the book

Carolyn R. Wilker, author of Once Upon a Sandbox and contributor to several anthologies, including Hot Apple Cider with Cinnamon. Watch for Good Grief People book coming in late February. 

www.carolynwilker.ca

Being a Good Samaritan—Carolyn R. Wilker

Last evening, I was sitting on my front porch reading and enjoying the slightly cooler air. My neighbours were playing a game of Frisbee, the father with his 12-year-old son, and two smaller children playing on the lawn. Noah, who’s just two, ran out onto the road and around the car, out of sight, while his father tossed the Frisbee to his older brother. I called to the father about Noah, and he went to retrieve his son. [Fortunately there were no cars coming by at that moment.] Olina, who’s four, came over to say hello and I stepped off the porch to talk with her. She wanted me to come over, and then I was invited to play Frisbee too.

This is nothing unusual. I’ve talked with the parents many times and visited in their home. We’ve talked about gardening, our children, and in my case, grandchildren. This family is from Ethiopia, but that’s not unusual for they are among neighbours who come from other countries in the world— Africa, Germany, Croatia, England and Romania—just on our side of the crescent.

Yesterday the presiding pastor at our church read the story of the Good Samaritan. A lawyer asks a question of Jesus, the Messiah— “Who is my neighbour?” And Jesus, knowing the lawyer’s mindset, tells a story.

“A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell into the hands of robbers…” (Luke 10: 29b) The man had been beaten, robbed and left for dead. A priest came by and passed by on the other side of the road. He did not stop to help the man. Next came a Levite, who acted in the same way. Sometime afterward a Samaritan (named by the place he came from) came by.  He felt pity for the hurt man and showed compassion. He bound the man’s wounds and took him to an inn. The Samaritan gave the innkeeper money to take care of the injured man and promised to pay any extra expense the innkeeper incurred when he came back that way.

Jesus asked the lawyer who he thought was the neighbour. The lawyer answered, “The one who showed him mercy.” [Some versions use the word ‘kindness.’] Jesus tells the lawyer to go and do the same.

It didn’t matter to the Samaritan that the injured man was a foreigner to him. He showed compassion on another human being in need. 'Good Samaritan' has come to mean one who offers help.

We are called to do the same. The injured person could be someone who’s African, Romanian, Buddhist, native Canadian or Inuit. Here I’m not speaking of those who play the game of being 'in need' when in fact they are not, but for someone who has been hurt in some way and needs immediate help.

It may be that you can do no more than stand with the person, call for medical assistance and wait until help arrives. You might call attention to a child who has run onto the road, because you don’t want to see the child get hurt. It could be a person falling on the sidewalk where you're walking. Stopping might be simply helping to right the person again and taking time to inquire if the person has been hurt. Or it could mean applying first aid, if that’s something you can do, after an accident and until an ambulance arrives. It could even be blowing snow on a driveway in winter for someone who cannot shovel it.

We, too, are called to be a Samaritan.

 Carolyn Wilker is an author and editor from Southwestern Ontario. Learn more about what she does here.

Writing Life Ramblings – Biographical Ruminations (Peter Black)

Writing biographical pieces without your subjects’ knowledge and permission can be a precarious thing. You can never be certain beforehand whether your subjects would approve or disapprove, or like or dislike what you say about them. There’s potential for ruptured relationships . . . hmm, or even a lawsuit.

An author may be somewhat visionary and might extrapolate future outcomes based on trends and data, but is hardly a seer per se. This introduces another aspect of biographical writing that can be rather unsettling for the author.

Have you ever written about a contemporary individual in positive, affirmative terms, but later felt let down, disappointed, or more than a little peeved, when the person later fell far short of the glowing word portrait you’d painted?

I’ve had that experience—but rarely, and have more often been tremendously encouraged to find otherwise. A recent case was of a trucker I met and conversed with, in 2009 at a Christian retreat.

Courtesy: en.wikipedia.org

Shortly after, I wrote a column article of the encounter, in which I shared some of the personal testimony that the fellow recounted to me of his healing and how he came to Christ. I didn’t use his name—I’d forgotten it anyway—and didn’t seek his permission. In February 2010 I posted an edition of that piece on this blog, entitled, ‘Prophets’ – of a Sort.

In 2014 I included a version of that story in the book, “Raise Your Gaze . . . Mindful Musings of a Grateful Heart.” I’d occasionally wonder whether the man was still alive and whether he was still mobile (prior to his healing he had severe back trouble and had lived with unrelenting pain).

The other matter of wondering concern was whether he had continued growing in his Christian walk of faith and trust in Jesus.



Courtesy: anglicansablaze.blogspot.com

Recently I saw him again and reintroduced myself. Now retired from trucking, he still loves to meet with His Christian brothers and sisters and sing and praise the Lord at his church. His back is still doing just fine. Although unable to drive now, since he suffers from macular degeneration, he cheerfully looks to God for healing of that condition. I'm thrilled that he is still "pressing on the upward way."

It’s understandable that writers who create fictional characters and the ‘lives’ they ‘live’ can feel a relational connection with them, and some even call them their babies or their kids. 

That’s different for biographers. If remaining true to the character of the individuals about whom they write and whose stories (or portions thereof that) they tell, it’s different. Biographers neither create the characters nor the circumstances in which they live their lives.

In some instances when writing a living person’s story I may begin the process already having a personal relationship with the individual. That may deepen during the process of working through the elements based on the information available, but the individual is neither my baby nor my creation, although I may rightfully regard the work produced as such.

Although I’ve had cause to grieve when learning that one of my subjects has followed a course that casts  a shadow over the earlier portrait, my recent encounter with the former trucker encourages me to not give up on painting word pictures featuring people’s real life-experiences.

He continues along the course of life that raised my gaze to give thanks to God for His gracious working in the man’s life. Redemption in action—gaze-raising joy. And that's something worth writing about!

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Peter's second book is a compilation of inspirational articles on a variety of themes from his weekly column. These are interspersed with brief expressions intended to encourage. Ebook edition is now available through Amazon.

 

ISBN: 978-0-9920074-2-3 (Angel Hope Publishing)

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Peter's first book: “Parables from the Pond” – a children's / family book (mildly educational, inspirational in orientation, character reinforcing). Finalist – Word Alive Press. ISBN: 1897373-21-X. The book has found a place in various settings with a readership ranging from kids to senior adults.

Black's inspirational column, P-Pep! appears weekly in The Guide-Advocate (of Southwestern Ontario). His articles have appeared in 50 Plus Contact and testimony, and several newspapers in Ontario.

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See No Evil? (Discernment in the Arts) - Carolyn Arends

Many of us who peruse this blog love stories (whether those stories be told in novels, playhouses or movie theatres.) Many of us here also seek to follow the Apostle Paul’s encouragement to train our minds on “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, [and] whatever is admirable (Phil 4:8, NIV).” Often, we face a quandary. What if, to tell a story honestly, unsavoury or downright evil behaviours must be portrayed?  Are we constrained—either as consumers or creators of art—to keep certain topics or words off limits?

This spring, I found myself struggling through this question with a group of college students in a class I was teaching on faith and the arts. We could all agree upon extreme cases of exploitative and gratuitous sex, violence and abusive language that are clearly outside the bounds of the Philippians 4:8 mandate. But we were less sure what to do with greyer areas. What if the questionable elements in a story are not there to titillate, but rather because they are an important part of telling the truth about the human condition?  The Bible itself contains many frank and unflinching depictions of human depravity; if we were to legalistically and thoughtlessly apply the Philippians 4:8 mandate to Scripture, we’d have to censor a good deal of what is there.

Despite several lively debates, we never did arrive at a clear consensus on this issue. But we did settle on a framework that helped us at least begin to more thoughtfully and prayerfully engage with stories of all kinds. When tasked with evaluating a piece of art in any genre, we asked ourselves three questions, inspired by the Church’s long history of appropriating (quite appropriately, I think) Plato’s three Transcendentals.

Is it good?

Is it true?

Is it beautiful?

The first question – Is it good? – involves ethics and morals. It requires us to consider not only whether a story contains offensive words or scenes, but also whether the worldview it tacitly conveys is an ethical one. It might be possible for a film to be rated “G,” but embody an insidious worldview in which material success is considered the ultimate meaning in life, or people are merely means to ends. Conversely, it might be possible for a movie to contain violence, sex or language, but provide a perspective on the human condition that moves the viewer towards a more ethical or moral stance.

The second question – Is it true? – is an even more theological one. Does the story—whether it is fact or fantasy or something in between—say something honest about the world and the people who inhabit it? Does it hint at anything true about God? Even if the worldview in a story is in conflict with the Gospel, can it teach us something true about the perspectives and needs of the people who hold it?

The third question – Is it beautiful? – has to do with aesthetics. It asks whether the art in question is well-crafted and successfully formed. A depraved story may be breathtakingly depicted. (In such instances we should proceed with caution.) Or, as is sometimes the case in explicitly “Christian” storytelling, a good and true story may be shabbily crafted. (Caution is required here, too! Please!)

With these three questions, my students and I were able to begin a process of discernment that each of us will be working through for the rest of our lives. We might decide that a story lacking in one of the Transcendentals can still be worthy of our attention due to its strengths in another.  Most essentially, we felt challenged to try to create work ourselves that was deeply good, unflinchingly true, and as beautiful as we could possibly make it.

I pray you will go and do likewise!

Carolyn

PS – My own adventure in art-making this spring involves recording an album of Christmas originals, which will be released October 15, 2014.  This project will be my 11th CD; it’s the first one we’re crowdfunding. We’re asking people to consider pre-ordering the album (with great discounts and perks) in order to help us make it. Please check out our Kickstarter project. Thanks!