6 Way to Stay Youthful-by Heidi McLaughlin

My grandson Ryan and I have been in a fierce crib competition for the past fourteen years. This past weekend he came to visit his Nana, and the crib board came out of its dark hidden place ready to trounce this handsome young lad. In the midst of shuffling the cards his brows furrowed and he questioned me. “Nana, when I was young how come you never let me win?” I smiled and explained: “One of the most hurtful feelings in life are disappointments.  The sooner we learn to overcome unmet expectations in a healthy environment, the quicker we grasp the concept that disappointments are part of life. We have to embrace them and move on.”  I continued: “Furthermore, you don’t want to become jaded and end up a critical and grumpy old man.” Ryan nodded and smiled; he got it.

Spending a weekend with my grandson invigorated and reminded me how important it is to have an open mind in order to stay youthful. Here are 6 ways to stay youthful.

1.         Hang around with young people. Things are not “the way they used to be.” We have to open our minds to different ways of thinking and stay current with the lifestyle and needs of our young people and millennials. Thinking young keeps us young.

2.         Cultivate a thankful spirit.  Instead of feeding on disappointments and being grumpy that life didn't turn out the way we thought it would, be thankful for the many good things in your life. Ask yourself: “Whom would I rather hang around with, a scowling and critical person or someone who

expresses appreciation and gratitude for the every day things in life?” Being thankful keeps the smile on our face and makes us enjoyable to be around.

3.         Forgive quickly. Over time, unforgiveness harbours anger and causes us to lash out in ways that can make our faces turn ugly and bitter. It controls our emotions and stops us from being vulnerable and joyful.

4.         Remove stress.  We live in a stressful and demanding generation. But we have to realize that stress is a dangerous enemy that releases cortisol in our bodies and make us sick.  It can cause us to lose sleep, stomach ulcers, panic attacks, heart diseases and many other physical and emotional illnesses. 

5.         Get off the couch. Energy begets energy and if we want to stay healthy and keep our muscles strong, we have to move our bodies.  Exercise not only keeps our bodies vibrant and flexible, it rejuvenates our brain and keeps us alert and focused.

6.         Read good books. Older people’s conversations are too focused on illnesses, medication, and their aches and pains.  Yes, this is part of life, but wouldn’t you rather hang around with people whose conversations are filled with meaningful stories, current affairs and tending topics?

We don’t need to be reminded that we all need to do is drink lots of water, eat healthy and get plenty of sleep.  I am so grateful for this wonderful life God has given me and I choose to live it with gusto and joy.  We are all getting older but I agree with the Bible that says: “Therefore do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day,” (2 Corinthians 4:16 NIV).

Heidi McLaughlin lives in the beautiful vineyards of the Okanagan Valley in Kelowna, British Columbia. Heidi has been widowed twice. She is a mom and step mom of a wonderful, eclectic blended family of 5 children and 12 grandchildren. When Heidi is not working, she loves to curl up with a great book, or golf and laugh with her family and special friends.

Her latest book RESTLESS FOR MORE: Fulfillment in Unexpected Places (Including a FREE downloadable Study Guide) is now available at Amazon.ca; Amazon.com, Goodreads.com or her website: www.heartconnection.ca

Bear with Me by Ruth Smith Meyer

Me? Hibernate like an animal?  There may be some advantages.

As a child, author Thornton W. Burgess provided a delightful door to the world around me. I often sat, 15 or 20 feet from the ground, in the fork of a big maple tree in front of our home and entered the animal kingdom through his pages. Living with Reddy Fox, Jerry Muskrat, Jimmy Skunk, Cubby Bear and other creatures gave me the sense that I was sharing this planet with many other species. These stories helped me understand challenges that animals face, gave me a glimpse of their homes, the things that threaten their lives and the joy they find in the every day.

I thought of Burgess when our blog moderator asked the question “Hibernation – how come only bears get to hibernate? What would you do if you could go into hibernation?”

There are times when hibernation sounds like a mighty good idea.  Life gets hectic, when the days aren’t long enough to get everything done, or conversely, our attention is so focused on one thing that the other parts of life fade into the background. At such times, to have a season-long snooze becomes quite appealing. 

With my husband in the hospital and in rehab fifty minutes from our house, the past three months have been such a period in my life. There have been nights when I went to bed and thought I could sleep for a month or two, and mornings when I just wanted to burrow further into my bed and ignore the sun that shone through my window.

So if I were to hibernate, what would I like to do?  Starting around the beginning of November, I’d like to let my mind and body rest. The delta sleep with its deep slow brain waves could last for the first month or so.  

Over the years, I have found that I often come up with my best ideas for writing while I am partially asleep. After a time of that delta sleep, I would progress to the REM stage (Rapid Eye Movement) also known as active sleep or paradoxical sleep. I could wake up momentarily to jot down some of the ideas that spring up.  I could then alternate between the two stages. 

Recently, I’ve awakened in the dark of night, already praying for a person or a situation, some of which have been on my mind and others seemingly out of the blue.  During my hibernation it would be nice to have that happen frequently in those REM stages with brief moments of consciousness before falling asleep again.

Sometime, from the end of February to the middle of March, I’d like to emerge from my state of dormancy having had my body burn up most of the excess fat I’ve stored for too long, feeling fit as a fiddle, fired up and ready to get my mid-hibernation jottings in a more complete form on my computer.  Then I could look for places that would be glad to publish my wonderful articles and books.

Ahhh! Cubby Bear move over!

An attitude of Gratitude: Thanksgiving -HIRD

by Reverend Dr. Ed Hird

Life is messy. Family is messy. Marriage is messy. Church is messy.  How do we navigate through the complexities of daily life? A key to healthy sailing through life’s storms is gratitude.

 

The 19th century Cambridge resident, Charles Simeon, once said: “What ingratitude there is in the human heart.” It is so easy to end up as a complaining, grumbling person when things don’t go our way. The best therapy for a complaining or fearful attitude is to switch from grumbling to thankfulness, from moaning to praising, from bellyaching to belly laughing.

Dr. Patrick Dixon commented that someone who can never laugh is as emotionally imprisoned as someone who can never cry. Dr. Dixon notes that laughter alters the levels of various “stress” hormones such as cortisol, dopamine, adrenaline and growth hormone – all released when we are tense, working hard, worried or afraid. In typical office stress, all the hormones are released but no exercise follows and the body suffers. We develop stomach ulcers, arteries clog up, we become irritable and develop a host of other problems – all because the body is pumping out hormones we don’t need. Laughter, says Dr. Dixon, shuts down these hormone levels, keeping them low. Interestingly, endorphin levels (natural morphine-like substances) seem to remain the same, following laughter.

More and more research is coming to the forefront, showing that gratitude and joyful laughter are connected with healthy living, while grumbling is connected with diseased living. Dr. E. Stanley Jones once said: “If you are unhappy at home, you should try to find out if your wife hasn’t married a grouch.” Worry, fear, and anger are the greatest disease causers. We need to prune from our lives all tendencies to fault-find, blame and put down others. Instead we need to daily practice the healing therapy of “counting our blessings.”

 

I would encourage you to take 10 minutes today to write down 10 gifts that you have received in your life that you are thankful for. It might be your children, your work, your sense of humour, your spouse, your parents, the trees and mountains, or the country of Canada. Then practice saying thank you for these wonderful gifts. It always helps to have someone to whom to say “thank you”.  As the source of all good gifts, it only makes sense to express appreciation to the Creator of this mysterious universe. As someone once said, happiness is seeing a sunset and knowing who to thank.

I am more convinced than ever that each of us were born to be thankful. Ingratitude is like putting sawdust into our car engines. Through an attitude of gratitude, we are protecting ourselves from countless diseases that could otherwise come our way. Our immune system is a remarkably delicate mechanism that just cannot handle acidic emotions like bitterness, rage, or malice. I challenge you therefore to find out for yourself whether an attitude of gratitude will improve your emotional and physical health. Over our kitchen table is a wall plaque with the words: “in everything, give thanks.”

The church where I am Rector, St. Simon’s Church North Vancouver community was birthed in 1945 70 years ago in the Deep Cove Fire Hall. Many churches in the Seymour/Deep Cove area no longer exist.  One of the keys to St. Simon’s ongoing vitality is the gift of gratitude. God has taught us that all things work together for the good for those who love the Lord. He has taught us that what was sometimes meant for evil, God means for good, even for the saving and helping of many other people.

This Harvest Thanksgiving Oct 11th, the St. Simon’s NV community will celebrate its 70th anniversary with a joint 10 am service, followed by a complimentary barbeque.

 

May God give each of us the strength to develop an attitude of gratitude.  Gratitude is the key to everything healthy in our lives.  What are you grateful for on this Harvest Thanksgiving weekend?

— Ed Hird is Rector at St. Simon’s Church North Vancouver , part of Anglican Mission in Canada. He is the author of Restoring Health:body, mind and spirit and Battle for the Soul of Canada.

-originally published in the October 2015 Light Magazine

Writing Through Emotional Upheaval by Pamela Mytroen

     Our family took a hit in March and yet I was required to continue writing blogs, articles, and to edit pieces. At first I told my husband that I would never write again. (Picture the Drama Queen). Anxiety made it impossible for me to sleep or focus. But after a few days I was able to sit down and concentrate on a piece that needed editing. I found that if I compartmentalized, I could carry on. Now, when I write, I set a timer and I block out those relentless questions of what the future holds. "If I want to dwell on it later, I can," I tell myself. While this may not be the best approach to dealing with stress, it is working for me.

     There are still times when the situation flares up and pulls me down, and I must confess that I just can't get my focus to write. This is not something that is going to go away; I will likely be wading through it for years. Somehow I need to learn perseverance and push through. There are deadlines to meet and people waiting for my words. I can't just give up.

     I recently read the autobiography of Marina NeMat, "Prisoner of Tehran" (Penguin Canada, 2007). It was a difficult season of writing for her as it meant re-opening memories that she had wanted to seal off forever. But she wrote it so that the world might see what goes on at Evin Prison in Iran. She wanted the truth to be told.

"Prisoner of Tehran". A memoir by Marina Nemat. 

     Shortly after she and her husband immigrated to Canada, she met an Iranian friend at a dinner party in Toronto and by coincidence discovered that they had been imprisoned together in Evin. After a few phone calls back and forth, and talks about their time as political prisoners, Marina's new friend said she didn't want to talk to her anymore. "I can't do it. It's too hard. It's too painful," she said, her voice choked by tears. Marina understood and didn't argue, but it was this type of silence that had held her captive. "She had made her choice--and I had made mine" (page 4).  Marina felt that her own story needed to be told. She continued to write about the atrocities she endured and survived. Some of the emotions she experienced were shame, guilt, fear, and deep sorrow as she unlocked the carefully guarded memories, yet she carried on and finished writing her story so that the world might know the truth.

     How do you persevere through life's interruptions? What techniques do you use to write under the heavy cloak of emotional turmoil?

Pamela Mytroen

My sweet grand-daughter born in April with Mama watching closely in the background!

   

     

Stress, Impress or Bless - by Heidi McLaughlin

I felt offended.  My spiritual gift evaluation showed that my strengths emerged in the area of hospitality. “How shallow and frivolous is that?” I thought.  “I want my top spiritual gifts to be something more meaningful and powerful; like wisdom, evangelism, prayer warrior or teaching.” And yet I read Mother Teresa’s simple words, “Spread love wherever you go: First of all in your own house…let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile”. Those practical words changed my attitude and perception about this seemingly useless gift.

I also had to change my motive and learn the difference between entertaining and hospitality.  When our motives for entertaining guests are focused on impressing, it becomes stressful and exhausting to share our food, our guest rooms, our resources and our valuable time.  To unleash the true beauty of a hospitable heart, I needed to check my motive for inviting people in my home. I had to be clear about the difference between impressing and blessing.  Impressing is entertaining, and blessing is hospitality.

Entertainment:

Ø  Looks for payment; the words, “My, isn’t she a remarkable hostess…”

Ø  Says, “I want to impress you with my home, my clever decorating, and my gourmet cooking.”

Ø  Flaunts what we have and wants to impress people. It is about working hard to make everything look perfect and wearing ourselves out to astonish people with our creativity and skills.

Ø  It is the cover of a slick woman’s magazine with the alluring pictures of good food and stunningly decorated rooms.

Hospitality:

Ø  Is a beautiful and creative gift from God; one that we can enjoy and explore for the rest of our lives; and it never goes out of style.

Ø  Gives pleasure in giving, doing, loving and serving.

Ø  Seeks to minister and says, “This home is a gift and a haven from my Master; I use it as He desires.”

Ø  Is about making the time to share our home, serve people with love, and intentionally bless those that walk through our doors.

Ø  Is about the intimate connection between food and fellowship. “Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or a place to say for the night” (1Peter 4:9 NIV).

What is it about eating food together that creates such a sociable atmosphere? We all long to be part of some community; and we find some of this in our favorite coffee shop where we stop to chat with a friend. We also love to gather on a hot evening at the ice cream shop or sit on the patio of an outdoor restaurant swapping stories. I feel that eating together is a spiritual experience; a building of community through sharing our hearts.

In our present complicated, “hurry up life”; taking the time to invite people into our homes to share our food is probably one of the greatest acts of kindness we can extend to each other. It’s an opportunity to exhibit and share the most intimate parts or our lives.  When we have people into our homes it says, “Come and see where we live, and share what we have.” 

The Christmas season is the perfect time to use our gift of hospitality to share our homes with pure and joyful motives. I learned this principle from Jesus.  In His final hours on earth, with the shadow of the cross hanging over Him, Jesus spent His last evening sharing dinner with His disciples. He chose to share life-changing information with them that night around a table. It was a place of intimacy created by mouths enjoying the same food, bodies reclining around the table and eyes meeting across the plates. Here they enjoyed intimate community. 

Our homes and our tables should be a place to share what is meaningful with each other. After all, this was the place Jesus commanded us to remember Him by the breaking of bread and drinking of wine. Our homes are the greatest place to share food, blessings, and the “good news of Christ”; hand-in-hand.

Heidi McLaughlin lives in the beautiful vineyards of the Okanagan Valley in Kelowna, British Columbia. She is married to Pastor Jack and they have a wonderful, eclectic blended family of 5 children and 9 grandchildren. When Heidi is not working, she loves to curl up with a great book, or golf and laugh with her husband and special friends. You can reach her at: www.heartconnection.ca