Thursday, January 09, 2014

Saying Thank You is Good for the Soul/MANN

With the Christmas season behind us, you've probably got a thank you in place where ever it's needed.  This is the age of communication. Social skills are high and social media is top priority with many people.  It doesn't take long to send off a few words of gratitude to someone for coming into our life with a gift of a word, present or email/mail greeting.
“Saying thank you is more than good manners. It is good spirituality” (Alfred Painter). It is often the same people who understand appreciation for relationships that find it the easiest to return thanks. Some people seem to stumble over the words ‘thank you’, it’s almost like they have trouble seeing their personal goodness and acknowledging that others would want to give to them, appreciate them or care for them. So they avoid coming back to the giver to acknowledge the kindness. Perhaps not being able to say thank you is more about people’s self esteem than it is about being too busy to get around to it. Perhaps we think the gift is owed to us, so why should we humble ourselves to say thank you.
If you’re in the church, the term return-thanks is heard in liturgy, song and scripture. If you follow blogs or are on Facebook, you find comment-windows to enter those two special words.
 G.B. Stern said Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone. He obviously believes that people who don’t say thank you still feel gratitude, and unless it becomes verbal, it doesn't add to either the giver or the receiver’s relationship.
One does not give for the sole reason of receiving a word of thanks, but one does give hoping to contribute to a relationship. Giving works both ways. “I care for you enough to give you something” speaks volumes that you want to enhance a relationship. To hear the words thank you, only shows that it’s worked.
If you were raised with parents like mine, you would have often heard the words whispered in your ear, “And what do you say?” when someone gave you something.
 The other side of this opportunity of building relationship is accepting the opening to say you’re welcome to the person who has just said thank you. This may seem equally as difficult for those folks who have difficulty recognizing their actions have indeed pleased someone, or maybe they don’t want to build further on their actions if it is a duty-call.
Saying thanks builds relationships and when the giver has opportunity to say the words, you’re welcome, it completes the circle and the bond is strengthened. Thank you for reading this blog. I trust it sustains our relationship.

Blessings and a Happy New Year       
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Peter Black said...

And thank you, Donna, for sharing your sensitive, insightful thoughts on this topic. You cover so many aspects in this short piece. ~~+~~

Donna Mann said...

Thanks for your thoughtful words, Peter. I remember my mother-in-law sending a two-dollar bill in the mail for the children's birthday back in the 60's. I still feel badly that several months later, she would ask, "Did the children get their card?" She'd never mention the money, gracious as she was. That small memory constantly reminds me to say, "Thank you".

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