Musings on Religion vs. Relationship – Fox

(The following is a Guest Post by Grace Fox who is the author of four books including Moving From Fear to Freedom: A Woman’s Guide to Peace in Every Situation. She has written hundreds of magazine articles for publications including Focus on the Family and Power for Living. She’s also a popular speaker at women’s events and national co-director of International Messengers Canada. Grace can be found at www.gracefox.com )

There’s a big difference between having religion and having a relationship with the living God. A recent trip to the Ukraine provided me with an unforgettable visual in this regard. It happened in Odessa, at one of Europe’s largest Orthodox monasteries.

Upon entering the fenced grounds, two girlfriends and I covered our legs and heads with scarves. Only then could we proceed into a chapel adorned with burning candles and paintings of various saints. A half dozen worshipers sat in silence on straight-backed wooden chairs along the right wall. Several more occupied a bench against the back wall.

Suddenly a man’s snoring shattered the silence. His filthy clothes, straggly hair and beard, and the stench of urine betrayed him as a vagrant seeking refuge from the cold. A worshiper barked a command in Russian at him. The sleeper jerked his head and squinted through alcohol-glazed eyes before returning to his slumber. The worshiper turned away, muttering. Disgust etched his face.

We tiptoed outside where we found a small cemetery. Silk flowers and pussy willow branches decorated the graves. These willow branches, once blessed by the priests, guarantee good luck for the next year. A necessity, I suppose, for the deceased still trying to reach heaven.

We also saw a black BMW with a bottle of vodka perched on the cobblestone beside one rear tire. It’s hard to explain the car’s presence considering all visitors’ vehicles were parked along the public road outside the fence. My hunch is that the owner – perhaps a man of political influence – used his clout (and maybe a bribe) to drive into pedestrian-only territory to avoid walking in the rain. But the vodka bottle? Likely deemed inappropriate for a place of worship, so it waited outside for its owner’s return.

We peeked into other unlocked buildings and found intricate mosaics, marble floors, and gold throughout. The monastery’s architecture and cleanliness inspired awe. Its atmosphere, however, did not. It left me feeling sad and empty, for while the facility boasted religion’s finery, it lacked life and warmth.


My Odessa experience has caused me to reflect on the contrast between religion and relationship. One insight recurs: Religion focuses on a polished exterior. It traps people in performance and leaves them hoping, in vain, to please God with good deeds. Relationship, however, focuses on the interior – the heart condition. It provides confident assurance of God’s forgiveness and acceptance through Christ’s death and resurrection. It promises an abundant life filled with peace and hope not merely for the hereafter but for today, tomorrow and every day between now and eternity.

My experience has given me a fresh appreciation for Christ’s redemptive work. It has also forged in me a greater passion and urgency for those trapped in mere religion. Millions around the world are living without hope and dying without knowing Jesus. My relationship with Christ compels me to do something on their behalf so they, too, might know Him. And so, I will pray, give, and go.

How about you? Will you join me?