by Glynis M Belec
It bothers me immensely when Christians judge
other Christians in a mean-spirited way. Actually, it bothers me when anybody
judges anybody negatively, because it isn’t in the ‘be nice to other humans’
job description. In Matthew 7:1-5 we read this:
Do not
judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you
will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why
do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention
to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the
speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You
hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see
clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
Excellent
direction for those times when we think we are right and someone else isn’t.
Someone with a beam in
her eye cannot see things clearly. She has little discernment. As much as is
possible, and in all humility, we need to leave judging to God alone. Although
I do believe this scripture verse does say – it is okay to judge – once you’ve
removed the log from your own eye!
I believe we have a moral
responsibility to judge ethical behavior of others—but only if we are humbly
aware that we are not always right and sometimes we can be dead wrong. And the
key to proper judgement is to do it quietly and in love.
Look what it says in
Romans 3:23:
For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's
glorious standard (NLT)
Our ability to judge is
limited because we are sinful people. And we might want to remember
hat one
day, this will happen— 2 Corinthians 5:10:
For we must all stand before Christ to be judged. We will
each receive whatever we deserve for the good or evil we have done in this
earthly body who will ourselves, one day, come under judgment.
I am thinking that it’s
not so much the act of judging that is the issue, but from what I understand,
it’s the attitude with which we do it that matters.
It’s okay to be
discerning about someone’s character or teaching that seems askew according to
God’s word. But when we address this we are not to do it with ruthless Bible-thumping,
harsh words and threatening insults.
It’s okay to speak to a
fellow Christian about something you believe is sinful according to what is
taught in the Bible, remembering that interpretation is at play. Speaking in
love, in private is the correct way to approach a person—not speaking about him
publicly or behind his back, spreading gossip because you think others should
‘hear this, too!’
Check out Matthew 18:15:
“If your
brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens
to you, you have gained your brother.)
If I am jealous of someone and I criticize him,
then I am not building him up. I am attempting to tear him
down. Not nice.
If
I think I know the whole story (facts, motives) but I jump to conclusions, then
I judge wrongly – I am merely going on hearsay and opinion. Not right.
If
I make up my own rules because I think I interpreted God correctly, mainly
because I want things a certain way—as in distorting the truth to suit—then I
need to look out. Bad move.
If
I am not a nice person to be around and I consistently point out everyone
else’s shortcomings but don’t bother looking at myself, then I have a whopping
great log in my eye blocking my vision; which makes me arrogant, judgmental. Time
to look within.
If I share confidential
information with the wrong intent (humiliation verse humility) then I am
messing up big time, because I have no right to make someone look bad.
If I am being
self-righteous and critical over something that might mean one thing to me and
something else to someone else, then I deserve to get pinched by God.
And I think, most importantly,
if I think I have the right to say that someone is going to hell (pronouncing
eternal damnation) then who do I think I am? Look out for the thunder!
It’s not my job to
usurp God as Judge.
I know the best thing I
can do to resolve conflicts, or to stop judging is to submit to God by showing
love and living the Fruits of the Spirits as best as I can (love, joy, peace,
patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.)
Loving words don’t tear
down. People can choose to react how they wish, but as a Christian I should
speak loving and kind words even though I might be considered judging. I try to
use kind words even if I am judging a contest or teaching children about right
choices or working with writers to help them improve their work.
If I am harsh and heavy
handed with my words, beating others over the head with the Bible, then I am
working on making myself look like I know it all and ultimately, I am loving
myself more than I love others. Our words and deeds need to reflect God, not my
own stubborn pride, thinking I have all the answers.
Know what happens when I
imply I am the one with all the answers? People get defensive and arguments
ensue or they run away, not wanting anything to do with all that Christian
hypocritical nonsense. Not a very good witness for the Kingdom.
Resolving conflicts
involves an operation—removal of the plank, and then healing—demonstration of
God’s unconditional, non-judgmental love.
I’ve got my surgery
booked. How about you?
Glynis lives, loves, laughs and does an awful lot of reading, writing, publishing and praying in her home office.
How thrilled Glynis is to be part of GOOD GRIEF PEOPLE (Angel Hope Publishing) - an anthology filled with stories that help readers recognize, honour and celebrate the individuality of grief. www.glynisbelec.com
4 comments:
Wow - a real howdy-doody smack up the side-o'-the-head, Glynis! And how needful that is at times. And, coming from you, it is administered as always in a loving way, with grace and a hint of good humour. Personally, I'm quite often brought back to the same scripture and it's inherent cautionary, corrective message; it usually leads to a bit of an attitude adjustment. Thank you. ~~+~~
Thanks, Peter. I was actually pinching myself. Maybe a good reminder that we never arrive and always have room for improvement! And yes, I've needed a few (or more) attitude adjustments in my walk! I appreciate your thoughtful comments!
A timely reminder, and well seasoned with the grace you deliver so well.
Absolutely agree with you, Glynis! It's a very good reminder considering how we humans (and yikes...Christians!) are often so quick to judge others despite what Scriptures say. A wake up call is a good thing and I thank you for that!
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