Thursday, August 13, 2015

Bumps in an Author's Road Ruth Smith Meyer

"Life is full of unexpected
          and certainly unwanted twists and turns, 
but what makes us who we are 
      is determined 
           by the way we handle those situations." 
                                                         - Jennifer Cruz

After breakfast, Paul, my beloved husband went with his walker to the back yard where he has filled any available space in our flowerbeds with pole beans, tomatoes and lettuce. The farmer in him loves the out-of-doors watching things grow. He picked the beans and brought them with a few of the first ripe tomatoes into the house.  It was Monday morning, July 30

The next morning, he asked for help to get out to the verandah where he loves to sit. “My legs feel really weak this morning and I don’t want to fall.”  I called for help in evaluating him and for more equipment to manage this newest disability.  We were waiting on results of an MRI taken the week before, because of increasing back pain. But the surgeon who was to give us a report was on holiday.

By Thursday, I borrowed a wheel chair, for his legs were so wobbly, neither of us felt comfortable to have him use the walker. By Saturday, he was barely able to stand long enough to transfer.  Both of us began to wonder how long I could manage caring for him at home.  Finding each other after the deaths of our spouses, has been such a blessing.  We hated to think the time of living together may be over.  It felt like a big curve coming in our lives. By Saturday, he was barely able to stand long enough to transfer. 

Monday the surgeon was back, but the establishment still worked slow.  Finally, on Tuesday, because other parts of his body began to give out too and the pain was excruciating, I took him to emergency with the backing of the cancer clinic that has almost been our second home over the last eight years. Then things began to move quickly.
Wednesday it was decided to operate to remove a tumor from his spine. He was bumped twice, but finally had his surgery early Thursday morning. 

 The pain is gone, he looks well, feels well and eats well, but his legs are still rubbery when he tries to stand. We’re hoping he can get into a rehab hospital and that eventually they will be strong enough for him to come home.  But it’s a time of uncertainty. 

We had anticipated spending a lot of time this fall working on selling my latest book, speaking engagements, sales and other avenues.  I was excited about my next writing project that I hoped I could work at in between those scheduled appearances. 

But there is a definite curve in the road ahead, and as the quote at the beginning says—now it’s up to us to determine how we’ll handle this and let it become a part of our lives and who we are.  By God’s grace we shall “.. enjoy, endure, survive each moment as it comes to (us) in its proper sequence -- a surprise.”   Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration


Peter Black said...

Heart-tugging, deeply-felt and well-lived. Ruth, Paul's and your steadfast trust in our Father in heaven shines, as does your love for each other. Truly inspiring. Prayer continues to be offered up for you both. ~~+~~

Glynis said...

Ruth, you and Paul are such an example to me of perseverance, unconditional love and dogged determination. So sorry that Paul is dealing with the physical changes that somehow don't seem fair. And sorry that your writing plans are on hold for now. Yes, you are wise to seek help. May you & Paul find strength to put one foot in front of the other (Paul, literally; you figuratively!) Thanks for sharing a little piece of your heart.

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