The two Poplar trees stand side by side in the park across from my living room window. I've been watching them slowly turn golden for the past few weeks and a few days ago the fall winds came and began to strip them bare. A few stragglers are still hanging on, but soon the trees will be only trunk and branches. The inner sap has probably almost completely stopped flowing.They mimic how I'm feeling these days as I continue through chemotherapy. Bare. Sparse. Dried out. Enthusiasm is a word that seems foreign. I've forgotten what it's like to have hair. There are days when I want to rail against what's happening to me, days when I'm just angry. But then I look at those trees and I think of the scripture that has so often come to mind as I've watched them fade into dormancy.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. ... You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills will burst into song before you and all the trees of the field will clap their hands. Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree, and instead of briers the myrtle will grow. This will be for the Lord's renown, for an everlasting sign, which will not be destroyed." (Psalm 55: 8-13).
So I'm thankful for those trees that are standing guard so close by. I can see they're still standing, still swaying in the fall winds, waiting. I know the biology of tress; and though I know winter is coming I know their sap hasn't disappeared, it has just stopped running for a while and will run again in a few months. When it does they will sprout tiny green leaves that shout the word 'Revival' and will grow and clap loudly in the spring winds as their sweet scent permeates the air.
God is in the business of revival on all levels. But there is purpose in the dormancy. A friend sent me a link - - to a wonderful song, Blessings, by Laura Story. The lyrics rang true -
'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst
This world can't satisfy?
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise?
6 comments:
Beautiful meditation! The life-sap of faith and inspiration has evidently not departed from you, despite the fading and falling leaves of this season in your life. You've brought refreshment to me. Thank you Marcia.
My dear, you are surely an inspiration to all who read this!
God bless and sustain you.
A call back from me Marcia. As I checked in on the blog and comments today, I read my comment of yesterday, and it struck me that I signed off without alluding to the dormancy of winter and resurrection of spring.
I pray that in days to come we'll have the joy of hearing your testimony of that springtime and also witnessing the fruit that our Father in Heaven will bring forth to His praise.
A very blessed Thanksgiving to you and your loved ones.
Marcia, your words are achingly poignant. I agree with Peter--I'm so glad that God ALWAYS sends spring, in his own way, and his own time. Those of us who know you just want to hear it from you in person, rather selfishly, I admit! Dear friend...I'm reminded that bare trees also have their own beauty that inspires poets and artists to thoughts that remind the rest of us looking on that God is Lord even over the long dark seasons of our lives.
Marcia, I will never forget that lovely smile and that gentle manner when we first met so many moons ago. You consistency in your love for the Lord and your trust in His promises inspire me. A lovely post. xx
Very powerful, Marcia. Very real. May God strength, heal, and refresh you in your time of need.
Blessings, Ed Hird+
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