Hide and Seek - Ruth Smith Meyer

Have you ever watched very young children play hide-and-seek? The younger ones are apt to hide in corners, their faces against a wall or piece of furniture, so they can't see anything, but the rest of their bodies, or their backs are exposed to anyone else. The hider can't see, so they assume the seeker can't see what isn't readily visible to themselves.

It has been my observation that as adults, we are much the same. Our short-comings, our character flaws or areas where we have some lack, we try to hide from ourselves by not looking at them--closing our eyes to what we don't want others to see.

Many years ago, I was part of a women's group that began to meet for fellowship and Bible study. We had grown up in the same small church and we were all friends. We decided to begin by telling each other our faith journey and a bit of what we struggled with in our inner selves. Each evening we had several women share until we all had our turn. In spite of our familiarity with each other, it was an eye-opening experience.

Each woman's story often contained bits that felt to herself, like deep dark secrets she had been hiding for a long time. Those revelations often were things that to the group were quite well-known parts of that person. It was like that little child, hiding her eyes when the rest of us could see the whole body, the hiding place exposed for all to see. The only new aspect was how the sharer felt about it--shame, dislike or despair, even agony--and a real desire to change.

As the grop continued, it was obvious that in sharing those hidden parts, release and healing began. Not only were we still loved and accepted by each other, those levels went way up because now we were all acknowledging the facts. Where, formerly, there may have been some disapproval and criticism of those character traits in each other, we now understood them to be part of the area in which that person desired growth and change. We rallied around each other to support each other's growth. Growth and change did happen! It was an exciting time that we still remember with great warmth.

That experience has been of great value to me ever since. When I meet people with aggravating personality traits, I far more readily see them as growth areas. Sometimes I picture them with their face in a corner, eyes tightly shut so as not to acknowledge what they don't want to see. It gives me patience and compassion. Deepening our friendship and trust level with people like that can often help them open their eyes and lose their fear of taking a look at the reality of their postition.

Sometimes I become aware of doing the same with one of my character flaws. I then am thankful for those who look past the irritation, gently pry me from my corner and encourage me to open my eyes.

Last night, I met with my writers' group. Only a few of us were able to make it, so although we did share our writing, we also took time to share a bit more personally. That group has helped me in my growth as a writer and as a person. Critique has become a valuable part of our coming together. At first, some were intimidated by having others make all those suggestions for change, but now the veterans welcome the input and look foward to the positive changes to our writing that the group can make through the process.

On the way home, I wondered how one could form a critique group for our lives. Yes, it could be painful at first, but would we begin to value it as much in our everyday lives as in our writing, if we could let others be honest and straightforward in what changes would benefit our lives? It may be a welcome and stable factor in our growth if we got used to its benefit.

In fact, probably if I open my inner ears as I receive critique in my writing, I may be able to make parallels to my attitudes, my carelessness, my first inclinations and reactions, even as I am receiving the critiques on my writing. Hmm-mm!

Author of Not Easily Broken, Not Far from the Tree and Tysons Sad Bad Day

http://www.ruthsmithmeyer.com/

Musings - Smith Meyer

WRITE! Canada 2010 has happened--and it happened without me. Each year since I first went, it has been an important event every June. While I always return bodily tired, my mind and my enthusiasm are renewed and invigorated. Of course that exhaustion is partly due to not wanting to miss anything, staying up for the night owl sessions and rising for the early bird or prayer sessions.

Although my publisher again entered my latest book in the contest for an award, this year because of events in my life, I decided I couldn't attend. My mind didn't listen though and from Thursday to Saturday I was conscious of what I was missing.

Then today, four days after the close of the conference, the TWG letter containing the judge's evaluation and remarks came in the mail. I debated if I really wanted to know what it said, but curiosity won out and I tore it open. After several years of work, editing and redoing, testing it out on children of the ages I had mentioned (with good response) having positive affirmation from the publisher, my writing group and from people who have purchased the book, the judge's feedback didn't reflect any of that. On a scale of one to five, the categories were marked. 2,3,3,3,4,1,2,2,5,3. Was it disappointing? Yes, but not devastating.

Again, I was thankful for what I have learned at WRITE! Canada and in my writer's group. We all differ in our likes and dislikes--even fellow writers and the honourable judge. The very thing one person finds the most intriguing or heart-warming just doesn't do it for another. What charms one reader makes it hard for another to connect.

We need to seriously weigh what the "experts" say, put tu use those suggestions that feel right to you the author and then extend to yourself the grace to trust in your own intuition as well. It is helpful if there are additional judges (and I would recommend that) so that the picture is more complete, but each critique deserves our full attention.

Is it nice to capture a few awards? Yes, I think that can be very satisfying. Is it nice to Wow your judge? I surmise it may be. However, as Tammy Wiens says, "I have found that I've gotten so caught up in trying to please the industry at times that I've forgotten my audience. In the end, they are the ones who buy my books and let me know if they are good or not--not editors or publishers."

My biggest and best award comes from the people who have been helped in facing their own challenges by reading my books. If I have brought understanding, growth or comfort to even a few readers, then my writing has not been in vain. Instead of a sticker on the front cover proclaiming my book to be a finalist or award winning book, there is a warm spot in my heart, knowing God has used my efforts to bring help, healing, or even enjoyment to my fellow travellers in life.

Raising the Bar - Austin

There is something about the writing life that seems to work backwards. A manuscript that wins acclaim, earns its place on a publisher's short-list, and feels complete -- takes on a different tone when subjected to a professional critique.

Requesting a critique anticipates flagging some weaknesses. There is fear of overly harsh judgment. A writer's ego is pretty resilient and has an intensely strong core, but is still subject to bruising. Generous praise for the good, makes it much easier to swallow the advice on less than perfect aspects of the manuscript.

Practical, pointed suggestions, a heavily marked document, lack of transitions pointed out, inconsistencies flagged, places where dialogue becomes cumbersome, or it is difficult to follow who is speaking -- these things, seen by a new set of eyes with professional skills, become painfully obvious when pointed out. They can also prove rather painful to fix.

Two weeks of intense effort (on a "completed" work) have resulted in a new chapter added, dialogue examined and dialect greatly reduced. A key character is introduced earlier with little winsome glimmers given throughout. Dialogue attributes appear much more frequently, and transitions have been added in several places.

Like good editing, the changes resulting from a professional critique are almost invisible. They do not change the author's voice. They maintain the integrity of the story -- where the story has integrity. They are blunt and honest enough to point out places where it fails. Responding to a professional critique can raise the bar. Mediocre writing skills, of necessity, become sharpened. Good writing skills gain that little edge, move that much closer to excellence.

There is a mental exhaustion that sets in, but there is also a healthy tension. A deadline looms. I can settle for 'good enough.' The manuscript did, after all, make the short-list. But is 'good enough' a worthy goal? I have heard both strong praise and harsh criticism for this work and know it is going to fully engage some readers while missing others. But because I have taken to heart those things the critique pointed out, the quality has gone up measurably. Some will choose to keep reading, who two weeks ago with a 'good enough' manuscript would have quit by page three. Others will read with deeper satisfaction and delight.

Putting my writing under the scrutiny of an editor or a critique team is a bit like giving a surgeon permission to go at me with his scalpel without anesthetic. Like most writers, I don't like my writing being under the knife. But I would be hard pressed to put a value to this experience. It has undoubtedly been worth the cost, in dollars and in time and effort.

Deadlines loom, and had I chosen to skip this process, I would still have a book I could take pride in. Yet I would always wonder if I could have done just a bit better. When I hold the published book in my hands, the investment in a professional critique, and the intense and demanding follow-up work from that critique will undoubtedly prove to be a good and worthwhile investment. For I will hold a much better book than I would have published just two weeks ago.